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Girls and Gaijins

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RE: Girls and Gaijins

Postby neo2407 » Fri 01.19.2007 2:21 pm

Something I've tried to do since starting to learn Japanese, is to drop all stereotypes and approach it like a child. With no preconceptions at all...or that's the idea. There's probably at least one or two left in the old noodle.
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RE: Girls and Gaijins

Postby Tajoumaru » Fri 01.19.2007 4:13 pm

neo2407 wrote:
Something I've tried to do since starting to learn Japanese, is to drop all stereotypes and approach it like a child. With no preconceptions at all...or that's the idea. There's probably at least one or two left in the old noodle.

That's a good idea. Just don't be naïve like a child. ;)

While it's near-impossible to flush away all extant stereotypes, that may not be a bad thing as some stereotypes are useful--e.g., those pertaining to proper cultural mannerisms (being polite, indirect, etc.). It can be difficult not to let the more harmful stereotypes color our perceptions of foreign peoples and lands, however, as we're all inundated lifelong with such notions thanks to our wonderful and "unbiased" media (as well as fictional TV shows and film).


Kagemaru wrote:
Aren't foreign men guilty of the same stereotypyical attributes?

Yes; see my previous post.
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RE: Girls and Gaijins

Postby Mike Cash » Sat 01.20.2007 5:33 am

Harisenbon wrote:
James_dean wrote:
Western men treat their women like princesses while Japanese men treat their women like slaves

My god your not generalising at all :o


Reread his post. He's talking about the generalizations that many Japanese girls mistakenly make, and why there are such a large number of girls going after foreign guys.


I have met Japanese women who find the idea of dating foreigners to be unthinkably repulsive. They were all very nice people, who exhibited no signs of outward prejudice or ill treatment of foreigners of any stripe. They were just seriously (and visibly) repulsed by the notion of being intimate with non-Japanese men.
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RE: Girls and Gaijins

Postby Tajoumaru » Sat 01.20.2007 6:07 pm

Mike Cash wrote:I have met Japanese women who find the idea of dating foreigners to be unthinkably repulsive. They were all very nice people, who exhibited no signs of outward prejudice or ill treatment of foreigners of any stripe. They were just seriously (and visibly) repulsed by the notion of being intimate with non-Japanese men.

It's true that there's no accounting for preference when it comes to rules of attraction. Some find it inconceivable to couple outside their own ethnicity, or religion, or nationality (physical traits aside). Such partiality doesn't necessarily indicate abject bigotry, it just stems from a combination of learned sociocultural behavior and, more significantly, the complexities of the human mind. From experience I've discovered that a high level of comfort and familiarity is important, especially to women, which would help explain the stay-within-one's-own-circle mentality.

I'm white as can be, and for whatever reason I prefer non-white women. I have no idea why, it's just always been the case. I don't have a preference for any particular ethnic group, I'm just more physically attracted to darker-hued females. That my current girlfriend is Japanese is a matter of circumstance; we became friends first, and romantic partners later. I'm just glad she finds 白人 attractive!
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RE: Girls and Gaijins

Postby Styledatol » Sat 01.20.2007 8:38 pm

Very interesting thread, I like the contradiction of the posts too, gives you the option to decide by yourself given the different opinions you see.

I've met a few Japanese girls, and I actually liked them more than most of the white girls I've met/been with. At first I thought it was an exception, but a guy I know, who lives in Japan, confirmed that most Japanese girls, are generally more composed than girls in the western world shall we say?
I've had relationships with a few girls and some were too flamboyant for my taste. So... the reason I like Japanese girls, is because, those who I have met left a good impression of me, as I like girls who are calm and graceful (might be the wrong word to say it).

My two cents, regarding the reason that Japanese girls like White guys, well as one of the previously mentioned girls said before: "You are an interesting guy, when I think I have you figured out, you do something spontaneous".
From that I derived that Japanese girls like white guys because they're different from what they're used to. Although people tend to fear something different, people are also attracted to exotic things. In Japan, white men are the exotic thing.
But I assume that after a while, those girls who are so excited about being with a white guy begin to change their mind. Its like eating a cake, at first its really tasty, but if you eat it frequently, the taste doesn't seem so unique anymore.
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RE: Girls and Gaijins

Postby neo2407 » Sat 01.20.2007 8:53 pm

Tajoumaru wrote:
I'm white as can be, and for whatever reason I prefer non-white women. I have no idea why, it's just always been the case. I don't have a preference for any particular ethnic group, I'm just more physically attracted to darker-hued females. That my current girlfriend is Japanese is a matter of circumstance; we became friends first, and romantic partners later. I'm just glad she finds 白人 attractive!


Like you, Tajoumaru, I'm white and I don't have a preference for a single ethnic group. And even though I've never actually met a Japanese person male or female (well there's a Japanese family next door, but I've never introduced myself to them), but for an unknown reason I find Japanese girls more physically attractive than any other girls. I have no idea why, I just do.
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RE: Girls and Gaijins

Postby Kdar » Sat 01.20.2007 9:20 pm

neo2407 wrote:
Tajoumaru wrote:
I'm white as can be, and for whatever reason I prefer non-white women. I have no idea why, it's just always been the case. I don't have a preference for any particular ethnic group, I'm just more physically attracted to darker-hued females. That my current girlfriend is Japanese is a matter of circumstance; we became friends first, and romantic partners later. I'm just glad she finds 白人 attractive!


Like you, Tajoumaru, I'm white and I don't have a preference for a single ethnic group. And even though I've never actually met a Japanese person male or female (well there's a Japanese family next door, but I've never introduced myself to them), but for an unknown reason I find Japanese girls more physically attractive than any other girls. I have no idea why, I just do.


Because they are different from the rest..

More exotic (its might not sound too good..but), or whatever you like to call it.

I think I am this way as well.

Especially those American white-girls.. seem.. too plain. (you know.. those "cheerleader" types... yak.. ).

And.. for me.. Personalities of foreign girl seem to be more closer to me. (I'm living in USA).
Maybe it because I foreign in USA as well. I don't know.
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RE: Girls and Gaijins

Postby neo2407 » Sat 01.20.2007 9:47 pm

That may be the reason. I said in my last post I liked Japanese girls "for an unknown reason", well there is actually one reason I know, I find them "cuter" than girls here. It might be part of the exotic thing. Like the "Friends" section on this site, under the "Kanji Benkyou" section, most of the girls shown there (I think) are cute.

P.S. Sorry if anyone thinks it's weird for a guy to say "cute" (that's what happens when you live alone with 2 women all your life and you have extremely good hearing, good enough to hear almost everything being talked about in your house....anyway...), but for me it's (probably) the 2nd best complement I could give to a girl. If any guys in my area heard me say "cute" I'd be beaten to a bloddy pulp.
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RE: Girls and Gaijins

Postby James_dean » Sun 01.21.2007 8:38 pm

I find Japanese girls more physically attractive than any other girls. I have no idea why, I just do.


Well i think its very natural because i think most western men do........the way japanese women dress and look after themselves is a big reason why they are physically attractive although western women can be attractive too so sometimes i do feel attracted to them too probably because i have been in japan so long and they are so different from japanese women in looks and personality......to be honest if you meet the right WOMAN(japanese or western) then thats how you can be happy and if you have bad experiences with either that can influence your opinion too but i think you should remain open minded and not get stuck on stereotypes as mentioned earlier.......
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RE: Girls and Gaijins

Postby neo2407 » Sun 01.21.2007 8:47 pm

James_dean wrote:
...if you have bad experiences with either that can influence your opinion too


That may be another reason I prefer Japanese girls. In my entire life I have met about 4 girls (not including family) that didn't either make fun of me, or treat me like...poop...shall we say.

Also, is anyone else scared to vote on the new poll for fear of reprocustions from one or more admins? lol just kidding...please don't hurt me.
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RE: Girls and Gaijins

Postby James_dean » Sun 01.21.2007 10:10 pm

In my entire life I have met about 4 girls (not including family) that didn't either make fun of me, or treat me like...poop...shall we say.


Sad to hear that but maybe you just met the wrong women......
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RE: Girls and Gaijins

Postby neo2407 » Sun 01.21.2007 10:38 pm

It doesn't help when your a Star Trek and Anime fan, who likes rock music in an area dominated by people who hate rock and love club music, and the person who could have been the inspiration for the face of Harry Potter (which you think might have made me a bit more popular with some people...but it didn't).
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RE: Girls and Gaijins

Postby Apache Dawn » Sun 01.21.2007 10:52 pm

I think it maybe be because of the less time spent on asthetics, that are still very bland (thus the American girl)... Japanese just have a beauty about them.
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RE: Girls and Gaijins

Postby AJBryant » Sun 01.21.2007 11:07 pm

Ya know, I've seen just about as many dogs in Japan as I have in the States. There is no "cute" gene the Japanese have that others don't.

That being said, I have the hots for Sawaguchi Yasuko.



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RE: Girls and Gaijins

Postby Harisenbon » Sun 01.21.2007 11:47 pm

AJBryant wrote:
Ya know, I've seen just about as many dogs in Japan as I have in the States. There is no "cute" gene the Japanese have that others don't.


Preach it brotha.

I think once people get used to looking at Japanese (or asians in general) they start to see past their own visual prejudices that "all Japanese girls are cute" or whatnot, and start seeing the HORRIBLE FUGLINESS THAT LIES BENEATH!!! or something.

It's kind of like when you get to the point when all asians no longer look the same to you, while all foreigners start to look alike.

(I just watched Departed with my wife, and for some reason I could not for the life of me keep Matt Damon and Leonard DiCaprio apart) :/
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