Gender

Post questions and answers about living or visiting Japan or the culture
Blizzard_Kei
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Gender

Post by Blizzard_Kei » Sun 02.25.2007 10:59 am

I've been wondering about this for quite a long time. It's based on my uncles's saying whose son studied in Japan and now working in a Japanese company. We met some months ago and he told stories about his son. My parents told him about me who also interested about Japan and he said that girls better not go to Japan.

That makes me want to know how actually girls are treated in Japan. I know in the past women are considered very small compared to man. What about in modern Japan? This matter makes me hesitating about continuing my study or seeking a job in Japan.

Anyway, I'm sorry if the topic is kinda... heavy, but I really need information about this.
English and Japanese student
Any correction is appreciated

Fletch13
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RE: Gender

Post by Fletch13 » Sun 02.25.2007 11:06 am

um...I learned about this in history class last hour of the day. Girls WERE considered less valuable than the families live stock. WERE. Key word there.
You know....I really love muffins.

Fletch13
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RE: Gender

Post by Fletch13 » Sun 02.25.2007 11:06 am

I can check for sure if you want.
You know....I really love muffins.

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keatonatron
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RE: Gender

Post by keatonatron » Sun 02.25.2007 11:20 pm

Within a marriage, the woman usually is expected to take care of the family and support her husband in everything he does. She's usually expected to focus on everyone else in the family, but hardly gets any attention herself. That's why women who want a career don't get married, and why married Japanese women tell foreign women to not come to Japan (because if they get married to a Japanese man, they will be expected to give all the support and won't receive the "ladies first" attention that is associated with the west).

Japan's culture is changing steadily, and young people don't seem to share the same feelings as strongly as the current middle-aged population does. However, it's still hard to tell how things will be in 10 years when those young people start getting married.

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Scavengist
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RE: Gender

Post by Scavengist » Sun 02.25.2007 11:47 pm

I kind of feel like America is changing Japan to a western style.. :( Is it because of foreigners, or is it natural?
I WAS BORN AND RAISED IN JAPAN!
*Akira hakate*

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AJBryant
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RE: Gender

Post by AJBryant » Mon 02.26.2007 3:29 am

I rather think it's JAPAN that is changing ITSELF. We have no direct power to influence squat.


Tony

hungryhotei
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RE: Gender

Post by hungryhotei » Mon 02.26.2007 3:45 am

Scavengist wrote:
I kind of feel like America is changing Japan to a western style.. :( Is it because of foreigners, or is it natural?
Do equal rights and opportunities for women really deserve a sad face?
天気がいいから、散歩しましょう。

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hiraikotsu
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RE: Gender

Post by hiraikotsu » Mon 02.26.2007 3:50 am

keatonatron wrote:
Within a marriage, the woman usually is expected to take care of the family and support her husband in everything he does. She's usually expected to focus on everyone else in the family, but hardly gets any attention herself. That's why women who want a career don't get married, and why married Japanese women tell foreign women to not come to Japan (because if they get married to a Japanese man, they will be expected to give all the support and won't receive the "ladies first" attention that is associated with the west).
By giving all the support to their husbands, does it mean that Japanese women are not suppose to have an opinion? There are some male Japanese bosses here where I work, and they do appear quite, um, stiff and unapproachable. Maybe it's a male chauvinistic thing....
This probably explains why my single Japanese teacher decided to come over here instead... and that's after she had spent 3 years in the UK. :D

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caroline
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RE: Gender

Post by caroline » Mon 02.26.2007 5:15 am

80% of the Japanese living in Paris are women, who would find it difficult to go back to living in Japan. Changes in society are slow.
Some years ago, I had to decide whether or not marry a Japanese and live in Japan, end my career, ... and after a little thought about life in Japan as a western wife to a Japanese, I'm still living in Paris.
If that is not what you intend, you may go to Japan and live there quite pleasantly for a while.
If you intend to seek a job there, first read Amélie Nothomb.

At Least I Can Fill a Bra
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RE: Gender

Post by At Least I Can Fill a Bra » Thu 03.08.2007 9:44 pm

Japan is not the best place for a single Western woman. I have lived here for 3 years and will be getting out ASAP.

The standard of living in Japan is good but this place is like going back to the 50s in terms of how women are viewed and how they behave. Japanese women are incredibly vain creatures hooked on diet pills, who walk knock-kneed and spend their lives curling their hair in the subway, applying fake eyelashes and buying padded bras and pants (no T & A in this country). They want to be housewives who can waste their husbands' money rather than making any of their own.

As for Western women, you get ignored by Japanese men, who are afraid of you and, and dirty looks from Japanese women, especially if you are of a slim build and have breasts.

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keatonatron
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RE: Gender

Post by keatonatron » Thu 03.08.2007 11:40 pm

You do understand that the women are jealous of you, and the men are intimidated by your beauty, right?

It doesn't make it any less uncomfortable, but you should know it's a compliment.

I have, on multiple occasions, had Japanese guys tell me "I really want a foreign girlfriend. I think they're so beautiful! But I know they would never be interested in me because they're too good for me, so I can't find the courage to talk to them when I see them."

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suhui
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RE: Gender

Post by suhui » Fri 03.09.2007 12:28 am

I have, on multiple occasions, had Japanese guys tell me "I really want a foreign girlfriend. I think they're so beautiful!
Are they refering specifically to Western ladies?
Spoof!

aKuMu
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RE: Gender

Post by aKuMu » Fri 03.09.2007 4:11 am

At Least I Can Fill a Bra wrote:
Japanese women are incredibly vain creatures hooked on diet pills, who walk knock-kneed and spend their lives curling their hair in the subway, applying fake eyelashes and buying padded bras and pants (no T & A in this country). They want to be housewives who can waste their husbands' money rather than making any of their own.
There are Woman like this EVERYWHERE in the World ;)

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keatonatron
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RE: Gender

Post by keatonatron » Fri 03.09.2007 7:13 am

suhui wrote:
I have, on multiple occasions, had Japanese guys tell me "I really want a foreign girlfriend. I think they're so beautiful!
Are they refering specifically to Western ladies?
Yes. Specifically, white women from the US, UK, NZ, Canada and Australia.

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two_heads_talking
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RE: Gender

Post by two_heads_talking » Fri 03.09.2007 10:36 am

I find it hard to answer such a generalized question.. That's like asking why all american women are so forward.. You see all American women aren't..

But back on topic, as mentioned a few times, Japan is going through alot of change with the relationship between men and women and husband and wife. There are still many that live traditionally where only the husband works, and the wife takes care of everything else and takes care of all his needs and there are some that have an equal relationship where much is equally exchanged to include family issues and emotional equality..

That said, Just like every country in the world there are men that treat women poorly and those men are usually in the underbelly of society and the girls who get involved with these men are usually either not thinking very well or are tricked into the roles they become. (think red light district, pimps etc)

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