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Should I give up my dream

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RE: Should I give up my dream

Postby Xaith » Mon 08.20.2007 2:23 pm

Honestly, this forum must be dwellings of the nicest people on the internet, I can't believe people are even taking time to try and help you. It gives me a warm fuzzy feeling inside.

I recommend you take time to augment your neurological problems while still in your home country (as has already been recommended). As someone has already said, leaving home for another country can be stressful and if you already have problems with depression or some other disorder that would be compounded by it; bad things can happen.

After you have a handle on your problems, go for your dreams (but be realistic) and be happy there are so many people on this forum willing to help you even after a very rude post.
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RE: Should I give up my dream

Postby two_heads_talking » Mon 08.20.2007 3:37 pm

op i have a suggestion. it's not nice but here it goes anyways..

long walk, short pier. do it. the cold water will cool you off abit.
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RE: Should I give up my dream

Postby doinkies » Mon 08.20.2007 3:56 pm

kayuu wrote:
Duelley49 wrote:
How is it self-pity when I'm worried about the people of Japan? How can you people be happy knowing Japan is going to someday become a barren wasteland?


Japan will never become a barren wasteland. Way before that happens, if it at all seems imminent (which it does not at the moment and the likelihood of it ever becoming that way is practically nil) people might just change their attitudes about it, don't you think?

A declining population at the present time does not mean that the population will continue to decline at the same rate to such an extent that there will, in the end, be nobody left existing there - in more likelihood the population will decrease to a comfortable point and maintain itself there. That, my friend, is not necessarily a bad thing.

Even if it did become a barren wasteland (probably due to some unforseeable reason like a meteor or a storm/other natural disaster and not population decline), the likelihood of it happening in my lifetime or the lifetime of all current citizens of Japan is so small that nobody really needs to care or worry about it.

And from what I can see, you barely give a shit about Japan as you have called its citizens 'idiots' and lashed out so much at those who don't give you responses that suggest that Japan is really the land of the rising sun and full of goodness and flowers that can only make one happy.


I agree with this post. Also, Duelley, if you bothered to do some research on the subject of declining populations, you will find that most industrialized countries, including many European countries, have also had low birth rates recently. (South Korea also has a low birth rate, lower than Japan's for that matter.) So it's not a Japan-only phenomenon. However, like kayuu said, I don't see those countries becoming barren wastelands any time soon. :p
あなたが好きだと言ったこの街並みが
今日も暮れてゆきます
広い空と遠くの山々 二人で歩いた街
夕日がきれいな街
-森高千里 「渡良瀬橋」
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RE: Should I give up my dream

Postby stevie » Mon 08.20.2007 4:14 pm

Yeah I certainly appreciate the straightforwardness of people here on tjp, since in many places online (and even moreso in real life) people sugarcoat things a lot. It's much more comfortable to know where you stand, even if you don't like it - and Duelley, I think you should consider that too.

Don't mind a bit of sarcasm here and there - rather, consider that people are taking the time to offer you help and intelligent responses. It'd be much easier to just turn a blind eye, you know? I don't think anyone wants to see you fail, comments about taking walks off piers aside.

When I went to Japan I was coming off a particularly trying breakup (divorce even, though we still haven't actually had the divorce yet). I absolutely couldn't wait to go to Japan and just forget all my problems, when my closest friend said to me, 'you can fly halfway around the world if you want but you'll still have the same mind' - just like many people here have already stated, and it's absolutely true.

And you know, my first four days in Japan were just amazing. I met up with a friend of mine, we had an absolutely fantastic four days together, I got to stay with her family, to see how they lived, all this awesome stuff.. and I got to share a lot of great experiences with a great person who I felt very attached to (she's now one of my closest friends, pretty much the big sister I never had - being close to Japanese people without speaking the language isn't impossible, but damn do I feel extremely lucky to have gotten such a close friendship out of what was supposed to be a casual meetup). Anyway, on day five she had to go back to work and suddenly I was all alone in Japan - and my god did I feel that loneliness in my heart, even when the rest of me was having the time fo my life.

Moreover, that very day, I got an email from my flatmate back home telling me he'd had to move out suddenly, leaving my apartment empty and leaving the heating on. Just cause you're in another country, it doesn't mean things don't happen at home - and believe me, you'll care about these things more than you think you will, just you're on the other side of the world and can't do a damn thing (unless you want to burden someone else with your issues).

So what I want to illustrate is kind of what people have already pointed out - Japan won't solve all of your problems (most likely it won't solve any - and remember just because you're interested in the culture doesn't mean you'll enjoy it, or even what you read and how you interpret what you read will even be accurate). But I also wanted to say that, you experience somewhere is only going to be as good as the people you share it with - if you're alone in Japan you're still gonna feel just as bad, even though there is a whole other country and culture to experience (maybe even worse with your condition, I don't really know how it works though).

In short, it'd be wise to form your opinion after you've been. On another note, if you want someone to confide in, feel free to drop me a PM. I'm pretty neat at listening and I'll try to help out if I can. On the other hand I'm no professional, so uh, take that for what it's worth.
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RE: Should I give up my dream

Postby two_heads_talking » Mon 08.20.2007 4:25 pm

stevie wrote:

I don't think anyone wants to see you fail, comments about taking walks off piers aside..


actually it was more a comment for teh op to consider cooling off a bit. i just added the water and piers to get a nice mental image going. there really is nothing here that suggests I want teh OP to fail or not to fail.
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RE: Should I give up my dream

Postby stevie » Mon 08.20.2007 4:38 pm

Actually yeah after I read your post again I realised that, woops :) Go my lack of interpretation. But still I think the OP might take it the wrong way, so I left my post unedited just in case :)
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RE: Should I give up my dream

Postby AJBryant » Mon 08.20.2007 4:41 pm

katafei wrote:
AJBryant wrote:
If you *know* you have a problem, you need to work at not letting it own you.

Nice one, Tony, I may just stick this on my bathroom door ;)


I have it on my refridgerator.

I *really* am trying to lose weight. REALLY I am.
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RE: Should I give up my dream

Postby Gan » Mon 08.20.2007 5:38 pm

This is probally going to be the most mean response but a very true one none the less.

If you ask me if you should give up. If you think that I can tell you if YOU should give up, and not do it. I'll say that If you have to ask if you should give up, then you shouldn't have tried in the first place.

Given up is not always bad, sometimes people have to give up
But asking if you should give up, to a bunch of random, annomoyus people on the web is just plain stupid.

In my opinon it is anyway.
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RE: Should I give up my dream

Postby Duelley49 » Mon 08.20.2007 5:44 pm

You people think you're all registered psychiatrists. I've thrown all my energy into one day living in Japan, so I WILL like it. I have no problems. Being alone doesn't make me depressed. I've had few friends throughout my life and it doesn't bother me. I often get depressed for no reason. Not because of something bad happening. I could easily go out and make friends, but I'm not comfortable doing so at this point in my life.

I would love to go to Japan. but I don't want to see it die out. I've studied the population problem. Other countries have it and I don't care. Chances are Japan's population will reverse in a few years and probably start to slightly increase for a few decades until it levels off. So far the alarmists have been wrong because Japan's population is going nowhere right now. However, I always worry about the worst possible things that can happen in life.

If any of you are wondering why I'm depressed it's because school has just started back and a girl I really liked decided to stab me in the back and decided to spread her legs for the first guy she saw. I get like this every few months, more often when school is in.
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RE: Should I give up my dream

Postby stevie » Mon 08.20.2007 6:03 pm

I think we're all well aware of our status as psychiatrists, registered or otherwise.

People are just trying to help you but your responses are full of acid, dude. What exactly is it that you want? It seems that as long as you keep this up you're not gonna have much fun with relationships period. As an aside, it's just a fact of life (especially in late teenage life), that people tend to like, and have sex with, people that aren't necessarily you. Seriously, try to accept it, get used to it, and then get over it. Don't blame the girl.

Anyway, I hope you make it to Japan and that you do enjoy it. Either way, you'll definitely grow as a person.
Last edited by stevie on Mon 08.20.2007 6:05 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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RE: Should I give up my dream

Postby SirFirestorm » Mon 08.20.2007 6:11 pm

Yea well, I've thrown all my energy into a spirit bomb to revive the world after declining birth rates destroy the earth so you dont need to worry about that part, I WILL SAVE JAPAN. Don't worry guys, I read an article about it on Yahoo News the other day along with my extensive research on it.

Common sense isn't taught in school. People are offering you advice only because you asked, not because they think they are all psychiatrists ready to teach you the solution to all your problems in an easy to read essay format. Listen and think about it a bit.

I can make up excuses for you too, but that won't solve your problems.
Last edited by SirFirestorm on Mon 08.20.2007 6:12 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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RE: Should I give up my dream

Postby Duelley49 » Mon 08.20.2007 6:35 pm

Leave me alone! What the **** is wrong with you people! I knew the world was out to get me! EVEN IF I HATE JAPAN I'M GOING TO STAY, SO **** off.
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RE: Should I give up my dream

Postby Duelley49 » Mon 08.20.2007 6:57 pm

I can esily just stay home the rest of my life. You all want me to be miserable and die alone and sad. That's what I'll do to make you all happy.
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RE: Should I give up my dream

Postby Xaith » Mon 08.20.2007 7:01 pm

No offense, but my new dream in life is that you get banned from these forums. Your attention-whoring spam is kind of annoying. When people try to help you, you just rebut with rudeness and self-pity.

Stop blaming everyone else and start considering the possibility that the problem is you.
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RE: Should I give up my dream

Postby Kakads » Mon 08.20.2007 7:02 pm

There was a guy like this on another forum I go on. He caused tons of chaos, like what is happening now.

Will an admin please ban him? -.-;
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