Is this correct grammer?

[Variand]

Santa-san!!! Nani nedan o meibo de warui na josei ka?

im trying to translate a funny saying for a penpal, but i dont think i got the correct grammer in there.
the qoute goes:

"Hey, Santa. How much for your list of naughty girls?"

i think i got the subject and object reversed, and i doubt i used the right particle... yeah, i know i still need practice ^_^

[xdj220]

Variand wrote:
Santa-san!!! Nani nedan o meibo de warui na josei ka?

im trying to translate a funny saying for a penpal, but i dont think i got the correct grammer in there.
the qoute goes:

"Hey, Santa. How much for your list of naughty girls?"

i think i got the subject and object reversed, and i doubt i used the right particle... yeah, i know i still need practice ^_^

'how much' is 'ikura' not nani. warui is not a -na adjective, so drop the 'na'. Remember that you always have to have the verb at the end of the sentence. Your current sentence structure is more like English. You'll want to end the sentence with 'ikura desu ka'. You'll want to start the sentence with the subject 'your list of naughty girls', then since it's the subject, add the -wa particle. I'm sure you can figure it out with that much.

So to answer your sentence, no, that's horrible grammar

[Variand]

hahaha, thanx. yeah i suck lol

so "Santa san, meibo no warui josei o ikura desu ka." would be a much better way of putting it.

Thanx. maybe this way my penpal wont shake his head in shame at having to deal with another stupid gaijin lol.

arigato.

[xdj220]

That's closer, but your particles are still wrong. It shouldn't be o ... Also some of your word order is still wrong (around 'no')