Learn Japanese with JapanesePod101.com

View topic - Another correction

Another correction

Do you have a translation question?

Another correction

Postby kentaku_sama » Sat 03.28.2009 7:18 pm

Here are some sentences I made using some new words I'm learning.
Please correct if needed.

もしあなたがする、価格を上げなければなりません。 If you do that, I'll be forced to raise the prices.
日曜日、 WAL-MARTに私は花さんが歩行ました見る。 On sunday, I saw hana walk into Wal-mart.
ピーマンより、ねぎを大嫌い!!   (I) prefer green peppers, and I can't stand green onions!!
一回、 私はとても大きいねこを会う。  One time, i met a Huge cat.
 ご免なさい、 私は日本語があまり話せません。 Sorry, I don't speak japanese (not) very well.   

I'm studying to pass the jlpt level 4 (just to know that I can) before I start studying for the level 3 test.
I'm not going to officially take 3 or 4, I'll buy the mock tests. Don't know where to find listening practice online. 
kentaku_sama
 
Posts: 208
Joined: Fri 11.21.2008 2:21 am
Native language: English

Re: Another correction

Postby Yudan Taiteki » Sat 03.28.2009 8:27 pm

kentaku_sama wrote:Here are some sentences I made using some new words I'm learning.
Please correct if needed.

もしあなたがする、価格を上げなければなりません。 If you do that, I'll be forced to raise the prices.


もしあなたがこうすると、私が価格を上げなければなりません

日曜日、 WAL-MARTに私は花さんが歩行ました見る。 On sunday, I saw hana walk into Wal-mart.


日曜日に、花さんがウォル・マートに入るのを見た。

ピーマンより、ねぎを大嫌い!!   (I) prefer green peppers, and I can't stand green onions!!


ピーマンより、ねぎが嫌い。
or
ピーマンのほうが好きで、ねぎだ大嫌い。

一回、 私はとても大きいねこを会う。  One time, i met a Huge cat.


あるとき、とても大きいねこを会った。 (一回 means "one time" as the number of times you did something, not the idiomatic English phrase "one time".)
-Chris Kern
User avatar
Yudan Taiteki
 
Posts: 5609
Joined: Wed 11.01.2006 11:32 pm
Native language: English

Re: Another correction

Postby NocturnalOcean » Sat 03.28.2009 9:59 pm

Yudan Taiteki wrote:
kentaku_sama wrote:
一回、 私はとても大きいねこを会う。  One time, i met a Huge cat.


あるとき、とても大きいねこを会った。 (一回 means "one time" as the number of times you did something, not the idiomatic English phrase "one time".)


に会った*
失敗は成功の元
NocturnalOcean
 
Posts: 688
Joined: Mon 03.12.2007 12:43 pm
Native language: Norwegian

Re: Another correction

Postby Bucko » Sun 03.29.2009 4:10 pm

もしあなたがする、価格を上げなければなりません。 If you do that, I'll be forced to raise the prices.

もし does not put a sentence into the conditional form, it basically warns the listener that what is about to be said is going to be in the conditional form. The conditional form for the verb する is either すると or したら.

Another thing, I'm not a native speaker but I have suspicion that using the なければならない (which is the ば conditional of the negative verb ない) might not roll off the tongue well if used within another conditional, i.e. すると or したら.

(もし)あなたはそうすると、価格を上げざるを得ない
If you do that I will have no choice but to raise prices.
Here, I've used そう for "that", and the ざるを得ない form to say "have no choice but to..."

日曜日、 WAL-MARTに私は花さんが歩行ました見る。 On sunday, I saw hana walk into Wal-mart.

Couple of problems with this one. Firstly, as Yudan Taiteki points out, to "walk into" (i.e. "enter") something, you use the verb 入る (hairu), so it would be 花さんがWAL-MARTに入った = Hana walked into Wal-Mart. Next, you need to convert the sentence 花さんがWAL-MARTに入った into a "thing" (a noun) so that you can say you saw it. You do that by putting の or こと at the end of the verb. So...花さんがWAL-MARTに入ったこと. Next, since you need to put 見る into the past tense, therefore 見た. Finally, remember to mark the thing that you see with を. In this case, the thing that you see is Hana walking into WAL-MART. The final sentence would be:

私は日曜日に、花さんがWAL-MARTに入ったことを見た

ピーマンより、ねぎを大嫌い!!   (I) prefer green peppers, and I can't stand green onions!!
一回、 私はとても大きいねこを会う。  One time, i met a Huge cat.

Further to Yudan Taiteki's reply. For "one time" as in "there was a time" you say あるとき or ある日 (aru hi). These literally mean "a certain time" and "a certain day".
Bucko
 
Posts: 56
Joined: Tue 05.01.2007 7:08 am

Re: Another correction

Postby Yudan Taiteki » Sun 03.29.2009 6:41 pm

Bucko wrote:
もしあなたがする、価格を上げなければなりません。 If you do that, I'll be forced to raise the prices.

もし does not put a sentence into the conditional form, it basically warns the listener that what is about to be said is going to be in the conditional form. The conditional form for the verb する is either すると or したら.

Another thing, I'm not a native speaker but I have suspicion that using the なければならない (which is the ば conditional of the negative verb ない) might not roll off the tongue well if used within another conditional, i.e. すると or したら.


I think a further problem that I overlooked originally is that と cannot be used there because the second part of the statement is not a natural consequence of the first.

You do that by putting の or こと at the end of the verb.


While the distinction between の and こと is extremely complex and not understood even by linguists, one fairly clear rule is that perceptual things take の, so Xのを見た is better than Xことを見た.
-Chris Kern
User avatar
Yudan Taiteki
 
Posts: 5609
Joined: Wed 11.01.2006 11:32 pm
Native language: English

Re: Another correction

Postby kentaku_sama » Sat 04.04.2009 12:57 am

Sorry I replied late!!! :D

Well, thanks for the correction, you do learn alot from them. ^^

But I was wondering, if の or こと makes a statement an object or thing, does that mean that you could express
" I hate the idea of people killing." in japanese. (not literaly of course because I'm sure theres a word for idea but this could work couldn't it?) 私は人が死ぬのを大嫌い。 I'm not sure if that's the right form of "killing" using it like that. :(

こうすると私たちは痛い。 does this mean, : "Having done this, we're hurting"
kentaku_sama
 
Posts: 208
Joined: Fri 11.21.2008 2:21 am
Native language: English

Re: Another correction

Postby furrykef » Sat 04.04.2009 5:33 am

kentaku_sama wrote:But I was wondering, if の or こと makes a statement an object or thing, does that mean that you could express
" I hate the idea of people killing." in japanese. (not literaly of course because I'm sure theres a word for idea but this could work couldn't it?) 私は人が死ぬのを大嫌い。 I'm not sure if that's the right form of "killing" using it like that. :(


Disclaimer: I'm still a beginner in Japanese myself...

Anyway, AFAIK, 死ぬ can only mean "die", not "kill". Also, an adjective such as 大嫌い can't take を. (Also don't forget that, despite ending with い, 嫌い is a na-adjective, not an i-adjective, so you might want a だ after it if appropriate.)

Perhaps this? 私は人が殺すのが大嫌いだ。

- Kef
Founder of Learning Languages Through Video Games.
Also see my lang-8 journal, where you can help me practice Japanese (and Spanish, and Italian!)
User avatar
furrykef
 
Posts: 1572
Joined: Thu 01.10.2008 9:20 pm
Native language: Eggo (ワッフル語の方言)
Gender: Male

Re: Another correction

Postby JaySee » Sat 04.04.2009 5:54 am

furrykef wrote:Perhaps this? 私は人が殺すのが大嫌いだ。


Apart from the fact that the first 'ga' should be 'wo' ('hito' is the direct object after all, not the subject), this sentence sounds perfectly fine.
JaySee
 
Posts: 314
Joined: Sat 08.04.2007 12:04 am
Location: Tokyo
Native language: Dutch
Gender: Male

Re: Another correction

Postby Hyperworm » Sat 04.04.2009 8:36 am

JaySee wrote:('hito' is the direct object after all, not the subject)
No, it should be the subject...
"I hate the idea of people killing [other things]"
fun translation snippets | need something translated?
BTC@1KMZXgoWiDshQis5Z7feCx8jaiP4QAB2ks
User avatar
Hyperworm
 
Posts: 493
Joined: Tue 11.20.2007 2:26 pm
Native language: English
Gender: Male

Re: Another correction

Postby JaySee » Sat 04.04.2009 9:12 am

Oh yes you're right, I forgot to look at the intended meaning in English. Though perhaps in that case, something like 私は殺人者が大嫌いだ or 私は人が殺すということが大嫌いだ or something might be more natural. I'm not really sure how "the idea of" can be translated best here.
JaySee
 
Posts: 314
Joined: Sat 08.04.2007 12:04 am
Location: Tokyo
Native language: Dutch
Gender: Male


Return to Translation Questions or Discussion

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 6 guests