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いつ日本に行こう?春 or お盆?

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いつ日本に行こう?春 or お盆?

Postby tōkai devotee » Sat 01.26.2008 8:49 pm

I'm wanting to visit Japan sometime this year, but I need advice as to when I might travel. It's been 10 years in April since I was last there, so I would kind of like to go back then as an anniversary. Plus, I love spring in Japan.
But my Japanese ’dad’ passed away last August and since this August would be his first Obon (初盆) I thought I'd be an idea to visit then. I'm very much accepted by the family and in fact before he passed away, he asked about his daughter in Australia (-me!). But I've been told that Obon is a very busy time, especially first Obon, and I'm thinking I'd be 'in the way.' On the other hand, I might be able to help out my 'mum' and sisters.

If anyone can offer some useful advice I'd be really grateful!
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RE: いつ日本に行こう?春 or お盆?

Postby richvh » Sat 01.26.2008 9:56 pm

Have you asked your host-family's opinion? Seems to me that would be more relevant than ours.
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RE: いつ日本に行こう?春 or お盆?

Postby Yudan Taiteki » Sat 01.26.2008 10:01 pm

Although on the other hand, the family may be reluctant to respond with "No, you should come later."
-Chris Kern
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RE: いつ日本に行こう?春 or お盆?

Postby tōkai devotee » Sat 01.26.2008 10:01 pm

I'm half way through writing a letter to them at the moment.
I just wanted to know if anyone had some advice. One Japanese friend told me that Obon would be too busy, but I was wondering if anyone else had an opinion. The more advice I can get, the better I can make a decision.
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RE: いつ日本に行こう?春 or お盆?

Postby coco » Sat 01.26.2008 11:32 pm

新盆に故人をお迎えしたいというお気持ちを伝えれば、先方のご家族も感動するだろうと思います。このスレッドの最初の文章を日本語にすれば、tokai devoteeさんのお気持ちも伝わるし、先方のご都合も伺えると思いますよ。 :)

「新盆は忙しいと聞いているので、その時期にお伺いするのはお邪魔ではないかと危惧していますが、一方で、私にも何かお手伝いできることがあるかもしれないとも思っています。」
----

私がToakiさんなら、たぶん春に行きます。
春に日本に行った際、先方のご家族と一緒にお墓参りに行きます。

私がホストのご家族でも、春にいらっしゃることをお勧めします。
ご存じとは思いますが、8月の日本は蒸し暑くてあまりお勧めできません。 ;)
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RE: いつ日本に行こう?春 or お盆?

Postby tōkai devotee » Sun 01.27.2008 1:57 am

そうですね、cocoさん。日本の夏が大嫌い!! :o 愛知県に住んでいました。一番蒸し暑い所ですね。三回も経験したことがあって10年前だけど、良く覚えています。 春の方が好きですね。そして、なるべき早く行きたい気持ちになります。cocoさんは書いた通りいつでもお墓参りに行くことが出来ます。

今家族に手紙を書くところですが、この質問を聞いてもいいでしょうか?

ご返事をありがとう。  :)
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RE: いつ日本に行こう?春 or お盆?

Postby coco » Sun 01.27.2008 5:24 am

ええ。正直な気持ちをお伝えして、先方のご意見・ご都合を伺うとよいと思います。 :)

お彼岸は3月17日からですし、月命日に合わせてお墓参りに伺うのもよいかもしれません。
(月命日とは、お亡くなりになった日のことです。たとえば8月20日に亡くなられた場合、毎月20日が月命日に当たります。)

早ければ3月末には桜が咲きます。
4月5月も旅行にはいい時季ですよね。

愛知県も10年前とはずいぶん変わったのではないかと思います。
楽しい滞在になるといいですね。 :)
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RE: いつ日本に行こう?春 or お盆?

Postby tōkai devotee » Sun 01.27.2008 6:49 am

月命日ですか。決してその単語を聞いた事がないんです。月例記念日みたいですね。月命日の読み方は何でしょうか。

愛知県は変わったかどうか分からないですが、お父さんがいない愛知県は(ちょっと変だけど)、前に知っていた愛知県ではないです。楽しい旅行になると思いますけれども、変な感じです。
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RE: いつ日本に行こう?春 or お盆?

Postby coco » Sun 01.27.2008 7:38 pm

失礼しました。
月命日=つき めいにち 
です。  :)       
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RE: いつ日本に行こう?春 or お盆?

Postby Yudan Taiteki » Sun 01.27.2008 7:51 pm

それは祥月命日の略ですか。私も聞いたことないです。
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RE: いつ日本に行こう?春 or お盆?

Postby coco » Sun 01.27.2008 8:05 pm

祥月命日(しょうつきめいにち)は、毎年一回です。
上の例だと毎年8月20日が祥月命日に当たります。
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RE: いつ日本に行こう?春 or お盆?

Postby two_heads_talking » Tue 01.29.2008 12:24 pm

maybe I am remembering wrong but isn't death followed by 7/7/7.. seven days, seven weeks and seven months? meaning that the family would be isolated for seven days, and considered to be in deep morning for 7 more weeks and still in morning for 7 months then on the 1 year anniversary they would be able to "back in the flow" if that is the case, making sure to arrive after the 7 months would be most appropriate. I just don't remember if sevens was a budhist thing or a shinto thing.
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RE: いつ日本に行こう?春 or お盆?

Postby tōkai devotee » Sat 02.02.2008 4:40 am

I remember hearing something along those lines. Doesn't the spirit of the departed 'hang around' for a period of 7 weeks after death before moving on?

If it's a Shinto thing, it wouldn't apply to this family because they are Buddhist, although they're not very religious. They'd probably consider themselves athiests with a Buddhist background.
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RE: いつ日本に行こう?春 or お盆?

Postby two_heads_talking » Sat 02.02.2008 11:04 am

I am not being argumentative, but my understanding was that most (yes, I am generalizing) japanese practiced many shinto traditions even if they are buddhist. However, the lingering spirits and obohn are definately buddhist belief/practices. (born shinto and buried buddhist, was the saying I would hear over and over.)

I seem to remember the 7 days of mourning as that was the time it took the spirit of the deseased to cross over. 7 weeks was to give the family adequate time to mourn and to be at ease with the loss of a dear loved one. and 7 months was a reminder to visit the butsudan to remember the one who was lost as well as the other encestors who had passed away.

Again, it has been something like 20 years since it was fresh in my mind, so I might have some of that confused. But I think with you being family, it wouldn't be inappropriate for you to ask about the mourning process as it would open up communication between you and them as well. (If anyone knows that it would be wrong, please say something, I would hate for an incident to occur because my recollection was foggy)
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