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商用文の練習(5/19-5/25)

Feel free to practice writing in Japanese or romaji. Help each other out with corrections or replying back in Japanese

商用文の練習(5/19-5/25)

Postby coco » Sun 05.18.2008 11:43 pm

TJPフォーラムにはユーモア溢れる投稿が多々あり、おかげさまで楽しませてもらっています。 :)
このSpin13さんの文章も秀逸で、とても印象に残っています。

Dear Mr. 7694,

I would like to sincerely apologize that not a single one of our esteemed forum members has been able to satisfactorily answer your question. In addition to finally providing you with the information you have requested, you are entitled to one (1) free ice cream cone at any one of our convenient branch locations. I would like to thank you for posting at The Japanese Page and hope you come again.

Japan has been 0.6 Americanized.

Sincerely,
The Cognoscenti

皆さんが差出人であるとしたら、この文章をどのような日本語で表現しますか?

挑戦してみようという方は、お気軽にどうぞ。
Phreadomさんがつくってくださった スポイラー・タグが便利そうですので、よろしければご活用ください。
(Phreadomさん、いつもありがとうございます。)

便宜上、5/25(GMT)を締め切りとします。

Spin13さん
Spoiler:
事前承諾なしに教材にさせていただきましたが、どうか悪しからずご了承ください。
もし原文を修正したい場合は、引用文を差し替えますので、その旨お知らせいただけると助かります。
Last edited by coco on Mon 05.19.2008 1:11 pm, edited 2 times in total.
coco
 
Posts: 3061
Joined: Mon 05.30.2005 12:43 am
Location: 東京都
Native language: 日本語(Japanese)

Re: 商用文の練習(5/19-5/25)

Postby spin13 » Mon 05.19.2008 6:39 am

To fix the error in my quoted post above, I would delete the word "so" in the second line of the first body paragraph. There are other possible fixes, such as changing "have" to an adverb such as "politely", but I think deletion best maintains the neutral tone.

coco wrote:事前承諾なしに教材にさせていただきましたが、どうか悪しからずご了承ください。
もし原文を修正したい場合は、引用文を差し替えますので、その旨お知らせいただけると助かります。


No harm, no foul. Have at it.

-Eric
You're probably not as smart as you think.
Unskilled and Unaware
spin13
 
Posts: 481
Joined: Wed 04.06.2005 9:38 pm
Location: Tokyo
Native language: English
Gender: Male

Re: 商用文の練習(5/19-5/25)

Postby coco » Mon 05.19.2008 9:10 am

Spinさん
早速のご対応、非常に助かります。
spin13 wrote:To fix the error in my quoted post above, I would delete the word "so" in the second line of the first body paragraph. There are other possible fixes, such as changing "have" to an adverb such as "politely", but I think deletion best maintains the neutral tone.

「the information you so have requested」を「the information you have requested」にしました。
間違っていたら、ご教示ください。

No harm, no foul. Have at it.

ありがとうございます。 :)
--
編集:失礼しました。 have を戻しました。 
Last edited by coco on Mon 05.19.2008 1:14 pm, edited 1 time in total.
coco
 
Posts: 3061
Joined: Mon 05.30.2005 12:43 am
Location: 東京都
Native language: 日本語(Japanese)

Re: 商用文の練習(5/19-5/25)

Postby spin13 » Mon 05.19.2008 10:56 am

Both "the information you requested" and "the information you have requested" make sense and are grammatical. I was going for the latter, which I believe fits best, but the nuance is minute and will likely not carry into the translations.

ところでこんなに楽しくしたり印象を付けたりできたようでうれしいのです。

-Eric
You're probably not as smart as you think.
Unskilled and Unaware
spin13
 
Posts: 481
Joined: Wed 04.06.2005 9:38 pm
Location: Tokyo
Native language: English
Gender: Male


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