i think one or two people may have misread or misinterpreted my plan/intentions.
to clarify - my post is not about getting laid. not to toot my own horn, but i can do that
without much effort. if that was all i cared about, it's all i'd be doing and i wouldn't be asking strangers questions. i'm just not interested in that
someone made an insinuation that i'd be acting
. i don't know how to do that, so it's not in the plan. i've got a pretty small brain, and all it can cope with is being myself on a fairly regular basis.
the lady in question has told me that she's very traditional. i'm very not traditional. we come from two different ends of that spectrum. i think that is what happened the last time i was in this situation, and as i said, it blew up in my face.
what my specific request for advice was was this - and maybe i should word it differently - for a japanese woman who hasn't had all that much experience with a foreign man, what are some social rules i should follow? what would be considered appropriate (by a fairly old-fashioned lady) on the first date, as far as physical contact, flirting, handholding, first kiss, etc.?
basically, what would a japanese man know about manners and what a lady expects that i don't?
in the end i'm going to do what feels natural and see how it pans out. a few pointers, anecdotes is all i'm looking for. perhaps the kind of story where a dude will say ""oh, i tried ____ with my wife on the first date, and 4 years later she said______ and we both laughed about what an ignorant baka-gaijin i was...".