お世話になります

[fielle]

Okay, one of the things I've never been able to figure out is the appropriate times to say お世話になります／なりました。

I'm going to Japan soon, and I'm going to be picked up at the airport by my former host parents, and I want to do things right this time. So, when's the right time to say it? Right when they pick me up? When I arrive at their house? Whenever? I'm not sure. My host parents (or at least, my host mother) is very kind and gregarious, and so sometimes being formal feels a little odd, but I know she would appreciate it if I did the proper 挨拶.

Whoever has the right information for me, thanks!

edit: fixed my spelling!

[Yudan Taiteki]

No comments on the social aspect at the moment, but it's お世話 -- せわ, not せいわ.

[keatonatron]

Okay, one of the things I've never been able to figure out is the appropriate times to say お成和になります／なりました。

You really need to learn the correct kanji, like Chris said.

As for when you should say it, it's usually used at the end of a long ordeal; something like "thanks for taking care of me this whole time!" So, in your situation I think it would be best to say it at the very end, right before you get on the plane to come home.

That said, it is a very formal and stiff saying, and used mostly in business or school. If you wanted a similar saying that is much more informal, you could try something for 私の面倒を見てくれて、ありがとうございました！

As for when you first get there, try a simple よろしくお願いします.

[two_heads_talking]

Okay, one of the things I've never been able to figure out is the appropriate times to say お成和になります／なりました。

You really need to learn the correct kanji, like Chris said.

As for when you should say it, it's usually used at the end of a long ordeal; something like "thanks for taking care of me this whole time!" So, in your situation I think it would be best to say it at the very end, right before you get on the plane to come home.

That said, it is a very formal and stiff saying, and used mostly in business or school. If you wanted a similar saying that is much more informal, you could try something for 私の面倒を見てくれて、ありがとうございました！

As for when you first get there, try a simple よろしくお願いします.

I never realized that "お世話なりました" was that rigid in it's use. I suppose I was over using it when I did. Thanks for that explanation Keat...

[fielle]

That said, it is a very formal and stiff saying, and used mostly in business or school.

Hmm, I had been under the impression that it was also something said when you visit to stay with other people's families, and my host mother had definitely told me to say it when I went to visit with another family, and not only at the end of the visit. Perhaps it's a difference between the people you interact with and the people I have interacted with? I was only ever in Kyushu staying with middle-aged, established families.

[ss]

Sensei sometimes brought us to JCS to attend workshop. We had informal activities, as well.
He would encourage us to speak to those people-in-charge in Japanese as much as we could.

IIRC, he would remind us to use words like 「よろしくお願いします」 for starting, "Thanks in advance for your help", "I look forward to your patronage", something to that effect. And, in between the activities, we could always say 「お世話になり、ありがとうごさいました。」 to that particular person who helped us. Or as a whole, after everything had been completed, before leaving, we could say 「いろいろお世話になり、ありがとうごさいました。」 to everyone. Even if there were some youngsters about 17 or 18 years old helping, it's okay to say that.

Obviously, you don't say 「お世話になります」 to a 7 or 8 years old little children. Just like a child greeting her/his parents HAPPY BIRTHDAY, needless always to say おめでとうございます, they can just say 「おめでとう、Pa　or Ma .....」

I think, sometimes when cultural aspect is concerned, it can be hard to discuss in public forums. Even Japanese themselves, some are very modernized, they are not used to formal speech, I guess. Some people think you are a weirdo to speak like that. On the other hand, there are people who mind the speech/way you interact with them.

[keatonatron]

Hmm, I had been under the impression that it was also something said when you visit to stay with other people's families, and my host mother had definitely told me to say it when I went to visit with another family, and not only at the end of the visit. Perhaps it's a difference between the people you interact with and the people I have interacted with? I was only ever in Kyushu staying with middle-aged, established families.

Well, in business you say お世話になります when you need something from someone. The most common usage in modern times is on the phone. When you call another business while at work, you say お世話になります before you even tell them your name.

I could see saying it to an older person when you go to stay at their home for a short while, but because of the business implications, it almost seems too demanding to say before a long stay.

The present-tense version has a feeling of "I'm going to need something from you, so I'm going to let you know right now", and the past-tense version has a feeling of "You really took care of me back there, thanks for the support!".

Of course I've only ever used it in school and business. I'm sure it has its uses outside of that, but I don't think it's very common with modern, young families.

[coco]

Okay, one of the things I've never been able to figure out is the appropriate times to say お世話になります／なりました。

I'm going to Japan soon, and I'm going to be picked up at the airport by my former host parents, and I want to do things right this time. So, when's the right time to say it? Right when they pick me up? When I arrive at their house? Whenever? I'm not sure.

私なら、空港で再会したときではなく、ホストファミリーのお宅にお邪魔したときに
「（このたびはいろいろと）お世話になります。よろしくお願いします」と言います。
ざわついた場所で言うよりも、お互いに向き合ってきちんと話せる場所の方がいいと思うからです。

but I know she would appreciate it if I did the proper 挨拶.

「お世話になります」と挨拶したらホストファミリーのお母さまはきっと喜んでくださるでしょう。
常に堅苦しくする必要はありませんが、要所要所できちんとした挨拶ができる人とできない人では、
印象が大きく違ってきます。
お察しのとおり、きちんとした挨拶ができるかどうかは、育った環境によります。
挨拶は人間関係を築く基礎ですから、きちんとした挨拶を親から教わらなかった子は惨めです。

my host mother had definitely told me to say it

ホストファミリーのお母さまは、fielleさんのことを大切に思っているから、
よそで恥をかかないように教えてくださったのだと思います。
立派な方ですね。
きっとそのお宅のお子さんも礼節をわきまえた人物に育っていることでしょう。

[two_heads_talking]

Thanks for that explanation Cocosan