Salaryman Senryu
Salaryman Senryu
何食べる? 何があるの 先に 言え 一心のつぶやき
This is our big project for the quarter. To write a little bit each week about why this senryuu is funny. I however need help with the translation. I can translate the individual elements, but as a whole this doesnt make sense. This is what I've come up with
何食べる?
What are you eating
What to eat
何があるの
What do you have
先に 言え
What was said previous or before
(I have no idea which reading is being used for先 I'm just guessing based on meaning)
一心のつぶやき
One Murmering Heart
(I assumed kokoro is the reading being used here please correct if I'm wrong)
(Sigh)
This is our big project for the quarter. To write a little bit each week about why this senryuu is funny. I however need help with the translation. I can translate the individual elements, but as a whole this doesnt make sense. This is what I've come up with
何食べる?
What are you eating
What to eat
何があるの
What do you have
先に 言え
What was said previous or before
(I have no idea which reading is being used for先 I'm just guessing based on meaning)
一心のつぶやき
One Murmering Heart
(I assumed kokoro is the reading being used here please correct if I'm wrong)
(Sigh)
How sweet life would be if korean in origin were playstation, anime and Wii
http://lang-8.com/92836
http://lang-8.com/92836
- Yudan Taiteki
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Re: Salaryman Senryu
Well, excuse me but...It's
「何食べる?」 何があるのか 先に言え
by 心のつぶやき (雅号= pen name)
(5-7-5)
「何食べる?」 何があるのか 先に言え
by 心のつぶやき (雅号= pen name)
(5-7-5)
Last edited by NileCat on Tue 10.06.2009 1:18 am, edited 3 times in total.
Re: Salaryman Senryu
Thanks guys , How was the translation
How sweet life would be if korean in origin were playstation, anime and Wii
http://lang-8.com/92836
http://lang-8.com/92836
- Harisenbon
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Re: Salaryman Senryu
That makes MUCH more sense.NileCat wrote:Well, excuse me but...It's
「何食べる?」 何があるのか 先に言え
by 心のつぶやき (雅号= pen name)
(5-7-5)
I had no idea what the original 川柳 was trying to say... :/
Try re-translating with what NileCat wrote.Thanks guys , How was the translation
The way you wrote the senryu makes little/no sense.
Re: Salaryman Senryu
何食べる?」
Nani taberu
What you eat
What are you going to eat
What to eat
何があるのか
Nani ga aru no ka
What do you have
先に言え
Saki ni koto e
I'm sorry I still cant wrap my head around this, Im going to be up for a while tonight it looks. The last verse especially is giving me trouble, Im not even sure if I'm using the right readings, though rikaichan has been a big help there
The only thing that this even closely resembles is an english saying "They say you are what you eat" But this doesn't make much sense either
I'm hopeless( the tutor center doesnt open till tomorrow yet sensei said to go if we needed help, true I have sat on this longer than I should, but i didnt think it would be this much trouble, sigh)
Nani taberu
What you eat
What are you going to eat
What to eat
何があるのか
Nani ga aru no ka
What do you have
先に言え
Saki ni koto e
I'm sorry I still cant wrap my head around this, Im going to be up for a while tonight it looks. The last verse especially is giving me trouble, Im not even sure if I'm using the right readings, though rikaichan has been a big help there
The only thing that this even closely resembles is an english saying "They say you are what you eat" But this doesn't make much sense either
I'm hopeless( the tutor center doesnt open till tomorrow yet sensei said to go if we needed help, true I have sat on this longer than I should, but i didnt think it would be this much trouble, sigh)
How sweet life would be if korean in origin were playstation, anime and Wii
http://lang-8.com/92836
http://lang-8.com/92836
Re: Salaryman Senryu
先に言え
saki ni ie
言う(iu)(dictionary form)
言え(ie)(imperative form)
saki ni ie
言う(iu)(dictionary form)
言え(ie)(imperative form)
Re: Salaryman Senryu
Thank you, I realized this after I remembered the 5-7-5 rule , Im still a little lost on the meaning thoNileCat wrote:先に言え
saki ni ie
言う(iu)(dictionary form)
言え(ie)(imperative form)
「何食べる?」 何があるのか 先に言え
"What to eat"
What do you have
Tell me(before)
(Sigh, time for the energy drinks)
How sweet life would be if korean in origin were playstation, anime and Wii
http://lang-8.com/92836
http://lang-8.com/92836
- Harisenbon
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Re: Salaryman Senryu
You're getting there!leonl wrote: 「何食べる?」 何があるのか 先に言え
"What to eat"
What do you have
Tell me(before)
(Sigh, time for the energy drinks)
Notice that the first part is in quotes, which means that it's probably what someone is saying. Because it's a question, imagine how you would phrase 何食べる? if you were asking it to someone.
Other than that, you pretty much have the translation down.
Just remember that Japanese grammar and english grammar do not have the same word order, so you may need to change up the word order of the last two lines to get it to make sense in english.
Re: Salaryman Senryu
So if I'm understanding you correctly it should go something like this
Tell me what do you have to eat?
or
Tell me do you have anything to eat
"What to eat" Tell me what you have(he said)
Tell me what do you have to eat?
or
Tell me do you have anything to eat
"What to eat" Tell me what you have(he said)
How sweet life would be if korean in origin were playstation, anime and Wii
http://lang-8.com/92836
http://lang-8.com/92836
- keatonatron
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Re: Salaryman Senryu
Psh, "what do you want to eat," he asks! Tell me what you have first!
Re: Salaryman Senryu
I love these and (somewhere, stashed away) have five volumes of the collected Salaryman Senryu from the annual contest put on by Daiichi Seimei.
ブス女
一度褒めると
逃げられぬ
-me-
ブス女
一度褒めると
逃げられぬ
-me-
Never underestimate my capacity for pettiness.
- Harisenbon
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Re: Salaryman Senryu
Well, if you just want to GIVE him the answer.keatonatron wrote:Psh, "what do you want to eat," he asks! Tell me what you have first!

Re: Salaryman Senryu
Well sensei did say we could have help like this, infact she said we would probably need someone(a native or otherwise) to tell us what the senryu meant. As much as fun as I was having straining my brain for the answer, this is much easier. Because I tend to rant, I'll just say thank you to everyone who helped me, I was totally lost when I looked at this senryu.Harisenbon wrote:Well, if you just want to GIVE him the answer.keatonatron wrote:Psh, "what do you want to eat," he asks! Tell me what you have first!
Last edited by leonl on Wed 10.07.2009 1:21 am, edited 1 time in total.
How sweet life would be if korean in origin were playstation, anime and Wii
http://lang-8.com/92836
http://lang-8.com/92836
- keatonatron
- Posts: 4838
- Joined: Sat 02.04.2006 3:31 am
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Re: Salaryman Senryu
After reading the thread up to this point, I do.Harisenbon wrote:Well, if you just want to GIVE him the answer.
