View topic - Please, can you help me to correct /verify translation?
Please, can you help me to correct /verify translation?
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Please, can you help me to correct /verify translation?
Please, can you help me to correct my translations if make sense and is good?
I hope I did not make too much mistakes/misrepresentations.
1) 6カ国10公演とても刺激的な日々でした
Everyday was very inspiring with 6 shows in 10 countries
2) 移動日も含めたら12カ国を回りました
10分に睡眠はとれなかったけど
たくさんの人々に出会い想いを感じ
次の制作のMOTIVATIONやENERGIESを
充電する事ができました
I went around for 12 countries including also the days of countries of passage
I gathered 10 minutes of sleep but
I feel the emotions of many people I encounter
I could charge the energy and motivation for the next release
3)新しく見えてきたもの
それをMUSICという形で具現化して行きたいと想います
I think I want to change embody it with the form of that music
that been seen newly??
4) this is hard I was not able to write it something that make sense:
Live Showに向かうまでの意識
作品に対する取り組み方 詩への想い
Thank you in advance
I hope I did not make too much mistakes/misrepresentations.
1) 6カ国10公演とても刺激的な日々でした
Everyday was very inspiring with 6 shows in 10 countries
2) 移動日も含めたら12カ国を回りました
10分に睡眠はとれなかったけど
たくさんの人々に出会い想いを感じ
次の制作のMOTIVATIONやENERGIESを
充電する事ができました
I went around for 12 countries including also the days of countries of passage
I gathered 10 minutes of sleep but
I feel the emotions of many people I encounter
I could charge the energy and motivation for the next release
3)新しく見えてきたもの
それをMUSICという形で具現化して行きたいと想います
I think I want to change embody it with the form of that music
that been seen newly??
4) this is hard I was not able to write it something that make sense:
Live Showに向かうまでの意識
作品に対する取り組み方 詩への想い
Thank you in advance

- tokyotower
- Posts: 30
- Joined: Fri 01.13.2012 4:46 am
- Native language: Italian
Re: Please, can you help me to correct /verify translation?
1) 6カ国10公演とても刺激的な日々でした
Something feels odd about the Japanese to me here. It seems strange there is nothing connecting 10公演 To とても
I would translate 刺激的な日々でした As 'some very inspiring days' Or something. 'Everyday' is not necessarily a wrong translation though.
I went around for 12 countries including also the days of countries of passage
The translation is correct but the English in the second half is a bit clunky. Maybe try keeping the sentence structure the same as the Japanese (i.e starting with 'Including')
10分に睡眠はとれなかったけど
This expression sounds unfamiliar to me but I would have thought it means 'I was not able to sleep for 10 minutes'
I feel the memories of many people I encounter
Maybe 'I could charge my motivation...'
3)新しく見えてきたもの
それをMUSICという形で具現化して行きたいと想います
What I have come to see anew, I would like to realise that in the form of MUSIC
4) this is hard I was not able to write it something that make sense:
Me too. It seems to be poetic on purpose but I can't really untie the true meaning behind it. Anyway great job!

なぜなら、おまえは・・・・・・人形だ
-

Ongakuka - Posts: 905
- Joined: Mon 09.26.2005 1:07 pm
Re: Please, can you help me to correct /verify translation?
Thank you so much for the corrections!
I saw that I understand the 'general meaning', my problem is to put in english!
I'll try to study more hard! Thanks!
I saw that I understand the 'general meaning', my problem is to put in english!
I'll try to study more hard! Thanks!
- tokyotower
- Posts: 30
- Joined: Fri 01.13.2012 4:46 am
- Native language: Italian
Re: Please, can you help me to correct /verify translation?
Nope. You'd need の instead of に (and probably は would need to change too).Ongakuka wrote:10分に睡眠はとれなかったけど
This expression sounds unfamiliar to me but I would have thought it means 'I was not able to sleep for 10 minutes'
Hint: it's wordplay. Try kanji

-

Hyperworm - Posts: 493
- Joined: Tue 11.20.2007 2:26 pm
- Native language: English
- Gender: Male
Re: Please, can you help me to correct /verify translation?
I think that expression mean:
十分に睡眠はとれなかったけど (I couldn't get enough sleep )
Because 十分に dont mean always "10 minutes" but also 'not sufficently' /plenty.
Right?
十分に睡眠はとれなかったけど (I couldn't get enough sleep )
Because 十分に dont mean always "10 minutes" but also 'not sufficently' /plenty.
Right?
- tokyotower
- Posts: 30
- Joined: Fri 01.13.2012 4:46 am
- Native language: Italian
-

Hyperworm - Posts: 493
- Joined: Tue 11.20.2007 2:26 pm
- Native language: English
- Gender: Male
- tokyotower
- Posts: 30
- Joined: Fri 01.13.2012 4:46 am
- Native language: Italian
-

Ongakuka - Posts: 905
- Joined: Mon 09.26.2005 1:07 pm
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