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Trial (line 1-4)

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RE: Trial

Postby natemb » Mon 03.20.2006 11:15 am

Again, I don't feel like I have much to add, but here's my version:[spoiler]I was about to sit down on the toilet when I heard a voice from the next stall: "Hey, how's it going?"[/spoiler]I also thought 腰を下るす meant squatting over a Japanese toilet until I looked it up on Space ALC (which is very useful!).
Rael wrote:
im having some trouble on the "と声がした" part.
rael: the particle と here indicates that what comes before it is a quotation. 声 is "voice" and した is the past form of する. The literal translation would be something like this: (A voice did "Yaa, are you healthy?") Even though it's a bit strange in English, you can tell what it means, right? Of course you could use だれか言った instead of this construction, but the feeling would be different. This one focuses on the voice, because the person is still unknown.

Edit: Note about the "ようとする" construction: even though it usually means "attempt to do" something, here I think it really carries the meaning of "about to do" instead (as many people have already observed). You can only get this from context: there is, in most cases, nothing difficult about sitting down on a toilet.

Shibakoen: Even though 元気 literally means "healthy," in my inexpert opinion it seems like in this case it's used more like "what's up?" and not like "are you ok?", partly because of context (there was never any explicit rushing that I could tell) and partly because 「大丈夫?」 feels like a more natural way to ask "are you ok?"
Last edited by natemb on Mon 03.20.2006 11:34 am, edited 1 time in total.
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RE: Trial

Postby AJBryant » Mon 03.20.2006 12:45 pm

ShibaKoen said: [spoiler]I tend to think of the "Yaa, Genki?" part as asking "Hey, you alright?" or "You OK?" instead of a generic conversation starter like "Hey, What's up" or "How ya doing" but that might be why I'm a B and not an A, ne...[/spoiler]
I reply:
[spoiler]Think about it for a second. Why would anyone -- out of the blue -- ask "are you all right?" when there's been no indication that there's anything wrong with the protagonist, or that the other guy has observed anything that would make him wonder that. The answer to the "meaning" of "yaa, genki?" is thereby obvious.

While there *may* be a hurried need to use the toilet raising concerns, that hasn't become clear to the reader yet, so assuming that is the case violates occam's razor. In short, when you hear hoofbeats, think horses, not zebras.[/spoiler]

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RE: Trial

Postby Shibakoen » Mon 03.20.2006 2:00 pm

I hadn't even thought of 大丈夫。 That's a good point. I see what y'all are saying, but the image in my mind of the scene so far is the dude speeds off the highway to go to the bathroom and with urgency he rushes into the bathroom. And I realize it's not been explicitly said that the speaker was in a hurry, but I thought that was implied from the first sentence.

To me, I'm wondering what would be more "out of the blue": some dude just deciding to strike up a conversation while taking a squat or asking "are you ok?" after hearing someone rush into the john. I know I'd want to know if someone was going to "blow up" the stall next to me, that way I'd know to hurry up myself to avoid the unpleasantness that's sure to follow.:D

That said, the point about 大丈夫 is I think the best point against my interpretation, but I just still think it's so weird that the guy barely has time to drop his pants before someone decides to strike up a conversation. Know what I mean?
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RE: Trial

Postby Toppes » Mon 03.20.2006 2:35 pm

How can i join in to this club or whatever it is?
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RE: Trial

Postby mechakucha » Mon 03.20.2006 3:12 pm

There's a possiblilty the greeting wasn't directed to the narrator. The sentence didn't implied that the other person was greeting the narator. I had the impression that "声がした" means "I heard a voice".
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RE: Trial

Postby ss » Mon 03.20.2006 6:02 pm

This 「やあ、元気?」 really sounds fishy to me :o. Coco-san was saying, given one year's time to me, I still can't figure out what's that implies, and yeah, u r right !! But, don't u know, it's *san times 8 agonies knowing that it's kind of laughter and yet don't laugh at all !! That's y I joined the club :D:D


* * * * *
Toppes-san, you're welcome! Pls refer to - How to keep the trial thread effectively. :)
Last edited by ss on Tue 03.21.2006 11:18 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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RE: Trial

Postby richvh » Mon 03.20.2006 6:38 pm

It's been a day, time for A group to chime in.
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RE: Trial

Postby AJBryant » Mon 03.20.2006 6:44 pm

I see what y'all are saying, but the image in my mind of the scene so far is the dude speeds off the highway to go to the bathroom and with urgency he rushes into the bathroom.


You're committing eisegesis. You're reading a lot into the text that ISN'T there. He was tooling down the highway, and had to go to the bathroom. So he pulled off to the rest area. Perfectly normal. The first door is locked, so he goes to the second. Perfectly normal. The guy in the first booth says "hi" -- NOW it gets a little weird. :)

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RE: Trial

Postby Kates » Tue 03.21.2006 12:27 am

I missed my turn so I'll toss my translation in here before the A-Team shows up. ^_^

[spoiler]I was just squatting down when (suddenly?) I heard someone next to me say, "Hey, what's up?"[/spoiler]

Though, I think the translation of "Yaa, genki?" will be effected by the next thing this person says. This 'greeting' can mean many different things, but we don't yet know the speaker's intention for calling out, so I'm not sure which translation of "yaa, genki?" is best.
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RE: Trial

Postby Harisenbon » Tue 03.21.2006 3:25 am

Chimes in:
I'm with Tony in that people are reading too much into this with the やあ、元気? and the 腰を下ろした lines. I feel the first is simply a greeting, as there has been no cause for anyone to say "are you ok?" Also, generally 大丈夫 is used for "are you ok?" whereas 元気 is just a standard greeting.

腰をおろす is a phrase that means to sit, or to settle down. It doesn't have the conotation of squatting (しゃがむ) but it does have a slight nuance of relaxing when you sit.
椅子に腰を下ろした
フィギュアを持っているオタクの隣に腰を下ろした。

My translation would be something like
[spoiler]As I was about to sit down on the toilet, a voice called out from the next stall "Hey. What's up?"[/spoiler]
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RE: Trial

Postby AJBryant » Tue 03.21.2006 3:52 am

Keith --

I like that one.

For the record folks (putting on my translator hat) that's excellent. Yes, the original doesn't mention the toilet, or the stall -- but that's how translation works. You can either be slavish to the original and butcher your target language, or you can be faithful to the intent of the original and write something that reads "natively" in the target language. Very seldom do you get to be slavishly true to the original and produce something that sounds natural in the target language.

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RE: Trial

Postby Justin » Tue 03.21.2006 3:42 pm

Sorry for being a little late here, just been busy with work here as everyone is on vacation this week leaving me to handle everything. :(

At this point though, I don't really think there's a whole lot I can add here, but I guess I might as well throw my translation out on the table here while I've got some free time here before lunch...

[spoiler]The moment I was about to sit down, there came a voice from next door, "Hey, how's it going?"[/spoiler]

I didn't want to copy Harisenbon there (who's translation, like tony said, is very good), so I tried to come up with something a tiny bit different.
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RE: line 4 source

Postby coco » Tue 03.21.2006 7:00 pm

Shall we go to next sentence ?
I hope the meaning of 元気 will become more clear when we read rest of sentences. Here is a 4th line.

Group C, please contribute within 48 hours from now.
The key words would be そうですが and 見知らぬ人.
Last edited by coco on Fri 04.07.2006 1:11 am, edited 1 time in total.
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RE: Trial

Postby AJBryant » Tue 03.21.2006 7:23 pm

For some reason I think a few people are going to be messed up by this one. :)


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RE: Trial

Postby zengargoyle » Tue 03.21.2006 9:31 pm

my take on line 4:
[spoiler]everybody knows men don't have conversations with strangers in the restroom.[/spoiler]
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