Is it legible? Any pointers? If it's gramatically wrong, blame the book

Thanks so much!
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ginormous
Edit: switched to links; img tag times out.
Thanks for the feedback. I didn't ever notice there was something above the crossbar.Apache Dawn wrote:
It is pretty good, but you cut out a little on the top of the す's and the は's and others like it. It looks a little better than mine actually.
2. I was wondering about that. I hadn't seen an examples of those in vertical writingYudan Taiteki wrote:
2. じゃ takes two spaces, not one (that goes for any of the small kana).
3. Your そ characters are a bit hard to interpret -- make sure you're looking at large diagrams that show the handwritten (not printed) style of the characters, and that indicate stroke order. The best one is your top character of the fifth line (although that should be そうですか)
4. さ should be handwritten as three strokes with a break in the middle (き as well).
5. The first stroke of か should be more curved (less angular, don't write it like the katakana カ)
6. You should use circles like this 。 at the ends of sentences, for instance いらっしゃいませ。メニューをどうぞ。
I wasn't paying attention at all and accidentally wrote waitress or whatever it was. I had been omitting the speaker's name/position since I could fit each piece of dialogue on one line. Good to know on the quotes in vertical writing, though; definitely wasn't aware of the proper orientation!tanuki wrote:
Nice.
Be sure not to mix up hiragana and katakana (you wrote ウエートレす).
Your quotation marks (or whatever they're called) are the other way around. They should look like in the picture.
This is just a difference between the typeset form of the characters and the way you handwrite it. It's sort of like how few people handwrite "a" like that (or the other "g" that appears in some fonts).angstycoder wrote:
4. Duly noted. I actually used to make them very separated, but everything except the book I learned from shows them in what appeared to me to be one break-free piece.
Noted on た ; I tend to make it like a t() (well, rotate the parentheses 90 degreesrichvh wrote:
A couple of things Chris didn't hit on that I noticed:
1. Stroke 2 of た is curving to the right at the bottom. It took me a while to figure out it was a た because of that. Keep it straight, or if anything, have it curve to the left just a bit.
2. It looks like you're making the center crossbar of そ as a seperate stroke. It isn't, it's all one stroke (in those fonts where it's two strokes, it's the top portion where the pen/brush lifts.)