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Writing a birthday card

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Writing a birthday card

Postby ess_jay_arr » Tue 06.12.2007 1:56 pm

Hey everyone, I'm trying to write a card for my friend, but... I've never practiced calligraphy, or even handwriting in Japanese. :|

I've posted my first few attempts below. Please can someone tell me how I'm doing, and what I need to improve. Obviously, it's not going to be perfect, I just want it to be good enough that it doesn't ruin her birthday. :P

By the way, I'm using acrylic paint. I know it's not ideal, but I'm not gonna go out and buy some expensive ink that I'm only gonna use once. :(

Any and all comments and nitpicks appreciated! :)

Image

Image

Image
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RE: Writing a birthday card

Postby Yudan Taiteki » Tue 06.12.2007 2:09 pm

Any of those are fine; IMO #1 and 3 are better than 2, but that's just my personal opinion.
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RE: Writing a birthday card

Postby ess_jay_arr » Tue 06.12.2007 2:16 pm

Yudan Taiteki wrote:
Any of those are fine; IMO #1 and 3 are better than 2, but that's just my personal opinion.


Really? No criticisms at all? That's... surprising.

I'm sure I could do at least a little bit better with some pointers.

Anyway, thanks. :) I might go with #3 after all.
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RE: Writing a birthday card

Postby furin » Tue 06.12.2007 8:44 pm

Great writing. I'm not flattering you.
Using acrylic paint is also fine, I suppose.
You didn't stop some strokes but no problem.

IMHO, in this case, what the most important point of them is "Dear Yuuki" part, I guess.
I agree with your choice #3.

But I never believe these are your first tries. :)
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RE: Writing a birthday card

Postby coco » Tue 06.12.2007 9:06 pm

Nice works! :)
わたしも3番目のものがいちばんいいと思います。
ゆうきさん も きっと驚くと思いますよ。
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RE: Writing a birthday card

Postby ss » Tue 06.12.2007 10:07 pm

Good attempt! :)
I also prefer the 3rd one.
Try to catch a good balance of your words, it will be perfect!
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RE: Writing a birthday card

Postby ess_jay_arr » Wed 06.13.2007 9:41 am

皆さん、ありがとうございます! :)

I already had a few more attempts before I read your comments... actually, a lot more attempts! :P

Image

Some of them were quite bad, but I think I can use one of these six...

Image

I think I messed up the ゆ in 'b'... and the 生 looks too small in 'e'... I think I prefer 'a', or maybe 'c'... but I don't really know what makes calligraphy good or bad... and they're starting to look a bit the same. :P

What do you think?

よろしくお願いします!
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RE: Writing a birthday card

Postby AJBryant » Wed 06.13.2007 10:07 am

One thing... you might want to reconsider how you're making your ゆ -- they really look more like aり with an extra vertical line.


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RE: Writing a birthday card

Postby coco » Wed 06.13.2007 10:36 am

I like "e". :)
Especially と and で in "e".
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RE: Writing a birthday card

Postby ss » Wed 06.13.2007 11:38 am

I prefer "f", it is neater. :)
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RE: Writing a birthday card

Postby Temari » Wed 06.13.2007 4:42 pm

I think "F" looks nice :D
Սիստէմ օֆ է Դաուն <3
¿Cómo, cómo como? ¡Como como como! xD
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RE: Writing a birthday card

Postby flammable hippo » Wed 06.13.2007 4:55 pm

C and F are my favorites.
Two muffins were baking in an oven. One turns to the other and says "sure is hot in here." The other replies "AH TALKING MUFFIN!"

二つのマフィンがオーブンで焼かれていた。片方のマフィンがもう一方のマフィンに向かって、"暑いね”と言った。すると、話しかけられたほうのマフィンは"アッ!喋るマフィンだ!”と驚いた。 :)
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